As I sit here, curled up in my bed contemplating how to say everything I want to say I can’t help thinking how lucky I am. I’m about to write about several people who I often refer to as heroes of mine but I’ve never met any of them. I do have other heroes, people that I do know personally and with whom I’ve interacted with multiple times, but those people I call my mentors, my teachers, my family and best friends and I can tell them how much I appreciate them whenever I want. These people, the three I’m about to talk about, are people I’ve never met in person. They are people who, in some way, have inspired me, helped me, or touched my heart. My heroes are people whom I someday hope to meet and if I’m lucky become friends with.
The ironic thing about my heroes is that none of them earned their titles simply by having that name or being that person. In each case, it was something that the person did, one little action, which caught my attention. For one person, it was her music. For another, it was her passion for the game. For the last, it was her writing.
The first time I heard anything by Rachael Yamagata was on an episode of Alias. Her song, entitled Meet Me by the Water, was playing in the background during a scene. At the time I didn’t know the name of the song or who it was by so I got online and did some research. Shortly thereafter I downloaded her entire cd, as well as all other tracks showing her name, from iTunes and began listening to the music that taught me to feel.
Before RY all I really listened to was the popular music on the radio or the foreign language stuff my sister would burn for me, so the sudden impact of music with real meanings and real truths was intense. Her music is the kind of music that even without the lyrics I feel like I could understand the emotion and intent of the song. One aspect of her music that most intrigued me was that she wrote on and played piano and guitar. When I was about 6 I started taking piano lessons. When I was about 12, I quit. Listening to Rachael play made me regret that decision. I wanted nothing more than to be able to sit down in front of our piano and write my own music, but I couldn’t remember anything about chord progressions or changes or even how to finger certain chords. I took up sax in sixth grade, but that didn’t help me either. It was the guitar that sat in the corner of my sister’s room that finally brought me some satisfaction.
After getting permission from my sister to use the guitar I immediately started teaching myself how to play using a guitar for dummies book. I learned a few simple chords and a couple of easy, cheesy songs and then I said to myself, “Screw the book. I want to play real songs.” After that I started looking up tabs online and never looked back. I’ve learned several of Rachael’s songs on guitar, but only one via tabs online. I’ve spent hours staring at youtube videos watching her hands move from chord to chord until I could play it back perfectly. I’ve spent hours just listening to the same song, trying to recognize patterns and intervals so that I could play it on my own. All of that time what I was really doing was preparing myself to write my own stuff, to express my own feelings in my own way. I’ve written pieces on guitar, sax, and even piano now and I make sure and do a little playing everyday.
Rachael Yamagata is my hero because her music touched my heart. It touched my heart and it taught me to listen, not only to chords, but also to myself and how I really felt. I now have a whole new way of expressing myself that I didn’t really have before and when I’m sad or just emotionally unstable I have a collection of music that comforts and protects me. So Rachael, I thank you.
Michael Jordan. Larry Bird. Magic Johnson. Shaq. Kobe. Sheryl Swoops. Pat Summit. Cheryl Miller. Candace Parker. Sue Bird. Every one of those names should elicit some reaction from anyone who knows basketball. They are all icons, all fairly well known within the basketball community but only one gets to call herself my hero.
I started playing basketball the moment I could walk and at the time I was a huge fan of MJ. When I heard that there was a girl down at Duke named Alana (pronounced the same as Elena, my name) who played basketball I had to check it out. That is how I got started in watching women’s college basketball and that is how one day while watching a game I discovered Sue Bird.
There is not one specific thing that she does that makes her my hero. I watched every UConn game on TV after I discovered Sue Bird and I’ve watched every Seattle Storm game as well. My game improved tremendously after watching Birdy play. I watched her every move like a hawk, studying how she handled the ball, how she distributed the ball and how she read the court. I’d see a move I liked and go outside and practice it until I thought I had it, and then at my next practice I’d put it to the test. I never expected to get things perfect and I rarely did, I knew no one could replicate her.
Watching her win championships at both the college and professional level have allowed me to see how strong of a leader Sue Bird is. She never gives up and never gets down. She is full of encouragement for her teammates and occasionally some choice words for referees. When she enters into a game she puts everything she has on the floor for her team. After she broke her nose during Seattle’s championship run she got surgery on it and played in the next game, a game in which she took another elbow to the face from a player and almost got a second from a ref. I knew that that was the kind of leader I wanted to be for my team.
Unfortunately, I am not planning on playing basketball in college, but I plan on being the best guide, friend and leader to everyone I can in life. Sue Bird is a great role model for anyone looking to succeed in life. Her tenacity, toughness, and attitude are all inspirational to me. I have a deep respect for her and how she handles extremely stressful situations. Birdy helped me have confidence in myself as a leader and has helped me reach new levels I didn’t think possible. So Sue, I thank you.
The following is an entry from my journal in 2006:
“Is it possible to fall in love with someone through their writing? Not that I have, because I haven’t but seriously… I think it’s possible but not probable you know. It could happen but most likely won’t. I’d love to be able to write like that though, be able to write with enough of myself and raw deep emotion to show someone who I am, that they actually loved me. A lot of people do that for me either through writing, singing or acting. I know it’s usually not the person I’m seeing but the idea of a person like that, so I don’t love them but fall for their work and crave more of it.”
I was on youtube looking for something interesting when I came across a 20/20 special interview. It was about this independent film that was made on an extremely small budget and starred not A-list actors, but the children or relatives of such people. The movie was called Last Goodbye and since I would love to someday produce my own movie I knew I had to see this. The amount of luck behind getting this movie from an idea to a screen was amazing and I had to see the outcome. Unable to find the movie in any store, I turned to Amazon.com, where I found and purchased the movie and had it sent via next day delivery.
I was very pleased with my purchase. Not only did it give me hope that one day I might be able to realize my dream of making a movie but it introduced me to a whole new generation of actors. One such actor, or actress I should say, was Clementine Ford. Now, I don’t know why, but something about her intrigued me and I wanted to know more. There are plenty of sources of information on the Internet, but no source of information is more reliable than the actual person. I decided to see if she had a myspace, and she did. It took some time for me to summon the courage to send a friend request, but I finally did it and I am so glad I did.
In reading the blogs on her myspace page, I realized that she was a very simple down to earth person, quite different than what I’d expected. She had links to musicians I’d never heard of and recommended different things to read. Always in search of new things to try I listened to the music and read the short story. She has very good taste. A day or so after she’d accepted my friend request she posted a blog about another blog she had, where she was going to start a little project of writing a blog a day everyday for thirty days. When she started writing I started reading.
It was at this point that I realized that I really loved her writing. Sometimes it completely baffles me and sometimes I come away with this incredible sense of familiarity. More often than not, I end up laughing so loud that my friends wonder what the hell is going on. I look forward to each day’s new entry and, obviously, to pass the time started my own blog. I’ve always enjoyed writing but have never had the courage to just say what needs to be said. I always worry about what people will think or how they will interpret what I’ve written but Clementine said that it’s getting things out there for yourself that matters.
I saw you first as an actor, then as a genuine person, as a writer and most recently as one of my heroes. Your work inspires me on a daily basis and your humor and honesty remind me that you are just like the rest of us. You, like me, are the good kind of weird. There is much more depth to your personality than I ever imagined there could be and you express that clearly in every word you write. You’ve introduced me to new music and new literature and have reawakened my need to just put myself out there. I’m not turning back anymore and I’m not hiding anything from anyone anymore. So Clementine, I thank you.
I would not be the person I am without the people who influence my life: heroes, friends and family alike. From the bottom of my heart I want to thank you for everything you’ve done for me, whether directly or indirectly. I wanted to say all this and now I have. With love… E
