Consider your teeth sunk in

I realize it’s been some time since I’ve given any serious thought to what I put on this page and I feel it is my duty to make this entry a meaningful one. I don’t mean meaningful as in profound or life altering, just meaningful as in something more than a quick note or song or video. The truth of the matter is that tomorrow something amazing will happen: we will have either a Black President in Barack Obama or (I hope to god this doesn’t happen) a female vice president in Sarah Palin. I have nothing against women but everything against someone with less foreign policy experience than my sister. Having done my duty and submitted an absentee ballot already I have taken part in this history making election and hopefully you have done or will do the same.

On a different note… a very different note, I have found that I am once again lost in my own head, contemplating life’s ifs, ands, and buts. Not one time have I escaped from myself alive and I expect this time to be no different so those of you with the ability to reach out and touch me I suggest you either temporarily back away to a safe viewing distance or hold me tight and never let me go because this ride is going to be intense. Perhaps intensifying the situation is the fact that I am rapidly approaching another major transitioning period in which I leave college and go home for a month and a half leaving those with whom I’ve become friends behind. I truly believe you develop stronger bonds when you experience something new together which means that I am more tightly bound to my college friends than I ever could be with my high school buddies… even if I am closer to them. I’ve had certain experiences here that simply cannot be understood by anyone not directly involved in the situation and when I leave and my stressors pile up and I crash no one will understand why. Yes, some of it is left over from before I ever got here ad some of it relates to back home as well but it still will not be the same. It’s like the saying “you can’t step into the same river twice”. With everything new there is something old and something that can never change but as with everything in the future, it will be what we make it. Right now, I’d say my future looks bright and despite the occasional flicker I don’t think it’ll get dark anytime soon. All that being said, I hope your days are as good as mine and that when you come crashing down you have someone to catch you… if you are worried about that then consider my arms your safety net. It’s the least I can do, really. If no one catches me I can at least make sure you don’t land on your face too. Nobody likes to see more than one person bloodied and broken though they’d rather not see anyone hurt at all. And by the way, I love you.

I'm a Toys R Us Kid!

Yet, I really need to grow up. It's terrible. I think I pretty much suck at life right now though, I'm not sure how much I'm supposed to rock at it at 18. I know I've done a lot of growing up over the past few years but there are a few things I just can't seem to get down. It's weird but I've always gotten along better with people several years older than me. I've always been able to talk to them more freely and I've found that their maturity compared to that of the people my age is quite refreshing. The only thing is that though I may want to be friends with these people, they don't have any interest in spending time with someone who isn't legally allowed to drink. It sucks. I mean, I totally get it, I don't really want to hang out with ten year olds and in some cases that is the age difference between me and the people I enjoy spending time with. I dunno. I just wish I was old enough for them to accept me because I know that half the time when we're talking they're wondering why on earth they're having this conversation with an 18 year old yet they continue because it's an intelligent insightful conversation that they are enjoying but at the end of the day they don't really want me around. I don't know what I'm trying to say. and I know that that sentence up there is jacked but I don't care. I guess it pretty much just sucks being 18 because the high schoolers are too young for you and everyone over 21 thinks you're too young for them. 

Randomness times 2

I got my acceptance letter from SCAD today. Don't know what that is? It's Savannah College of Art and Design and it's a school I'd very much like to go to. The only thing is, I opened it, read it, and that was it. I didn't get excited or run to go call anyone, I was just mildly pleased. Shouldn't getting into one of your top choices be more exciting than this? Perhaps not if you didn't get into your number one choice school, but nonetheless...

Seeing how that wasn't the actual point of writing today, let me move on. My sister is a vegetarian and my mother has suddenly decided to buy only certain types of healthy food and drinks... and I don't mind at all. The vegetarian thing isn't really a big deal because my sister just got offered what I would call her dream job in New York and won't really be around. When she is home though, we change up our meals to accommodate her need for a meatless meal. The thing with my mother is different. She's just buying healthier foods. For example, I had soy milk for the first time the other day and it was delicious. I just opened my fridge and there it was where the normal milk used to be. I was thirsty so I had some and was pleasantly surprised. So ya, things like that. I like it though because I don't have to think about eating better I just can because it's already there in the refrigerator or cupboard. Going to play guitar now... hasta