This week's Best of Me:

Okay so I am a closet Gleek. I like Glee. So much in fact that I'm seeing Glee Live this summer. And I will admit the only reason I started watching was because of the possibility of a lesbian couple on a prime time television show. Also, the actresses are immensely talented and attractive. My favorite character without a doubt is Santana Lopez (played by Naya Rivera). Her character started out as a bitchy boy-crazy cheerleader who simply tells it like it is to everyone. Recently though her character development, however minimal, has intrigued me. Her character, a 16 year old, got a boob job over the summer, had a moment of gay panic whilst making out with her best friend, and in the past few episodes alone has been given more dialogue, more feelings, and more screen time in general.

There is so much potential for a great story-line here but I fear that that potential will not be realized because of the nature of the show. Santana intrigues me to the point that I often find myself wishing I were a writer on the show so that I could give her the proper development and backstory she deserves. I really hope the writers do this right because if not I will consider it one of the biggest wastes of potential and talent (Naya Rivera's acting chops are superb) I've ever been privy to.

Week 6 Inquiry III - Reading from Text

I think I definitely agree with and practice Walter Murch's concept of closed-openness when working and creating because I definitely have to have a bare bones structure in place in order to get anything done yet I also thrive on the serendipitous moments that take place during the creative process. I love spontaneity as much as the next person but I can't start from an absolute zero in hope that something will spring to mind. There has to be a balance between intellect and intuition, there has to be a fluidity to my work style. I can tell myself to write a page everyday but I have to also be willing to write when inspiration strikes.

Week 6 Inquiry III - Visual Clustering

I had fun with this little assignment. It was interesting to see how we each interpreted the pictures and where our minds went as we put more down. We all had separate ideas for where we wanted the story to go at various points but we were pretty quick to find compromises that made everyone happy.

1. The alarm clock rings

2. "Bob" the main character wakes up to find

3. his girlfriend is aiming a gun at his face and his first thought is how he had picked out his gravesite the day before

4. However, she doesn't shoot and we cut to them talking on a couch

5. At which point she decides to leave

6. Taking off on Bob's motorcycle

7. Sometime later Bob is seen perusing the TV guide but

8. When he goes for the remote it is nowhere to be found

9. So he looks everywhere... Behind the tv

10. Outside

11. He searches for it day and night (montage)

12. Suddenly he looks up to find an Alien spaceship hovering over him

13. A look of awe comes over his face as he is abducted

14. Ten years later he is returned to the same spot

15. He sees a house in the distance

16. When he gets to the door it is pulled open by

17. His ex-girlfriend!!!!

18. Due to some unknown reason, most likely his prolonged contact with the aliens, his ex bursts into a pile of ash and bone

19. So he sweeps her up and buries her

20. No one ever knows what happened that night except for John Mclane... (Close up and cue opening titles sequence for Die Hard 5)

This week's Best of Me:

I hate how dirt and grime feel. The way walking barefoot across a hardwood floor leaves tiny particles of rocks and dirt and dog hair stuck to the sole of your foot. You end up tracking it everywhere and it gets in your bed and you just feel disgusting. With carpeted floors all the tiny wiry fibers trap the hairs and dirt and you feel cleaner because it's not stuck to you. Houses are way dirty.

Week 5 Inquiry II - Reading

I am one of those people that loves doing research for work. Whether I'm writing a short story or a script, if it's a subject I'm interested in I research the hell out of it because I want it to feel authentic. I use philosophy books as references a lot and also psychology books. I've used the wisdom of Buddhists and psych patients to shape my descriptions and dialogue and I think it enhances pieces in a way that is extremely real and believable.

Week 3 Introspection: Family Story Part II

Week 5 Inquiry II - Out of the Car

Flying Star Patio - I hear all the traffic going by a few hundred feet behind me. the constant stop and go and the occasional motorcycle or mufflerless junker. I can also hear snippets of conversations but I can't really focus in enough to decipher what exactly is going on. two women sit talking while their dogs (on leashes) sleep at their feet completely unmoved by all the strangers and smells surrounding them. The doors open every so often when this seemingly perpetually thirsty man goes to refill his tea or when a server brings out food or something. Speaking of which my water is empty... I like how everyone, except the woman on her laptop, let's their eyes snap quickly to the door whenever it opens, is it like a protective thing or simple curiosity? I feel kinda like a creeper now. Watching everybody, trying not to linger too long so as not to get caught looking. I feel like a spy doing recon and at any moment I may have to leap over the wall behind me and onto a not so discreetly hidden motorcycle in order not to be taken out.

Week 5 Inquiry II - Place Changes

I went at night again. I think someone was having drag races with their friends or casing a house nearby or something because I kept hearing the same car go by over and over. I am so familiar with the sound of the motor now that I could probably recognize the car on the street if it drove by even though I never saw it. It's still cold but not as cold as the last time. The silhouettes of the shrubbery are cool. Both wiry and kinda fluffy looking at the same time. There are still ants, though from what I can tell there are fewer than last time. Are ants nocturnal? It smells like pine. Very strongly of pine. I moved to one of the nearest trees and briefly contemplated stealing some sap in order to describe the feeling but I really can't stand how sticky it is and how hard it is to get off. So I just stared at the little oozing spot in the dark. I really want to see an animal. I hear things from time to time, like rustling but I'm pretty sure it's just the wind.

Week 5 Inquiry II - Digital Dome

I think the digital dome was pretty cool though I don't think, at this point in time that it's for me. I think it's got a long ways to go in terms of using it effectively. I think it definitely requires a different approach both to stories and to creative techniques. You have to think a lot more about space and what is both spatially dynamic and interesting. The story you're telling would need to be set in an environment that would be enhanced by the dome otherwise I think it would fall completely flat. If I was commissioned to create a work I think I would try something along the lines of a first person POV adventure. I guess it would be kind of like virtual reality in the sense that everything would be seen from the audiences eyes, if that makes sense. kind of like first person shooter games where you can look around you and see every viewpoint.

Week 4 Inquiry 1 - Limbering

I am extremely interested in psychology and if I could double major I would. I took a psych class when I was at SCAD and I had more fun and honestly put more effort into that class than any other class I have taken. I have copies of all my homework from that class (something I rarely keep) and i still do extra reading on specific subject matter in my spare time.

I would love to shoot a psychologist session in a film. Specifically with a sociopathic patient or just a very knowledgeable person who knows psychology better than their shrink. A battle of genius minds. Especially someone young seeing someone older. Highly intuitive youth are far more interesting to me than educated and learned adults. Though it might be more interesting to just have a film center around a highly intuitive young person than to just have a scene in a shrink's office. The way people see the world is more interesting and telling than the words spoken behind closed doors.

I think that the character "Eve" from a webseries I'm writing called "EVE(L)" is the perfect outlet for my interest in psychology because she is so intuitive and snarky and relatable.

Week 4 Inquiry 1 - Raw Material to Story

I have a few entries about tumblr and what goes on there so I think I'd do a story about that. Perhaps about someone who's obsession with the internet distorts their reality in such a way that real life now exists online and what's around them is immaterial. I really like psychological films so it would have that kind of a feel to it. The main character would be a college female whose interest in online blogs etc starts out as innocent curiosity. I think it would first effect her personality in a very noticeable way which would garner the attention of her friends and it would only escalate from there. It's a transformation story I guess and it would result in the girl seeming to make a full recovery but with the implication that she can never really escape the reality she's created for herself and that she's (open to interpretation) either blessed or cursed to live her life in a dream.

Week 4 Inquiry 1 - Lists

1. Classmates from Childhood

Deonte

Liesel

Abass

Enrique

Hassim

Michael

Jeremy

Jason

Jordan

Dominique

2. things that make me angry

ignorance

my mother

lying

dementia

hate

Bartie

when people insult my friends

being used

not being able to get away, escape

poor grammar

3. things that make me happy

friends

basketball

fighting

music

rachael yamagata

naya rivera

"Brittana"

Dark Chocolate

Skype sessions with Scott

dancing in my car to really loud music

4. things I enjoy doing now

writing

roadtrips

creating music

creating art

messing around on tumblr

playing with my dog

bonding with my niece

thinking about my future

decorating my room

coaching

Week 3 Introspection: Place Changes

I can hear more today. The wind through the branches behind me, the traffic on the nearest street. Why are there so many different sizes of ants? I mean really... Some are so small and others are big yet they intermingle, kind of like humans in that sense. We're different shapes and sizes and colors but we're all people. They're all ants. I didn't see the smaller ones last time. It was dark, maybe that's why. Kids are afraid of the dark right? the little ones? Is it too much of a stretch to compare little ants to little children? I don't think so. It's a little more... well, I can't tell if things look more dead or more alive but the tone seems to have changed. It looks... I feel like I can see the cold in the flora. Like, I can more than feel it, I can actually see the temperature reflected in the shrubs and trees. Things look hard and drawn back. Like when it's warmer out things seem more inviting or something like that. The dirt feels more coarse too. God I hate dirt. I know I'm not supposed to have technology out here or whatever but for the purpose of observing change my cell reception is still the same. I don't think that's really relevant though.

This week's Best of Me:

I think this is the first time I've seen my nephew (he's 25) genuinely in love. I've been privy to his many girlfriends and, unfortunately, baby mama's but this is the first time I've actually seen him genuinely happy when they're around. He treats her differently from the others and though I may have liked a couple of the other girls more she's growing on me pretty quickly. I think he's growing up for real this time too. I dunno. It just makes my heart happy.

Week 3 Introspection: Family Story Part I

Secret Rendevous'

A boy helps his big sister marry the man of her dreams.

My dad used to help sneak his older sister, My Aunt Connie, out of the house for dates with her boyfriend, My Uncle Eli, when they were in high school. He'd "take her to a movie" where she'd meet up with my uncle while my dad went off to do something with his friends. They kept it secret from their parents for I don't know how long. they've been married for over 50 years now and are so fricken adorable it kills me.

I think that it will show how tight knit our family is and how we much fun we have with each other even if it's not outright. There's familial love and romantic love and it would be set in the late 40's which is when they were in high school. So it's got the old school classic feel to it too.

Week 3 Introspection: 10 cars

I am sitting in "Lurch" listening to KP talk. She's telling a story. We're driving down a highway in South Carolina talking and laughing though everything is inaudible. We stop in front of a California style house. It's huge. 2 stories with fancy steps. I walk towards the front door and stop. I'm inside on the second floor looking out the window. I see lurch but KP is no longer in the front seat, Nay is. She's waving to me from the driver's side window. She smiles and beckons me to her telling me to hurry so we won't be late. I run to her. I'm sitting in the front seat while Nay drives, wind whipping through her hair. She laughs heartily though I still cannot hear it. I hear only the wind. I'm smiling; grinning from ear to ear. I love driving, especially driving for no reason but to go. I"m happy she's with me. I'm happy she's happy. We are driving along the California coast now and the sun is setting. I'm driving and Nay is beside me. I sing along with music I can't hear and Nay laughs at how terrible I am. It's raining now. I'm sad and Nay is quiet. We stop. We sit in the car in the middle of the storm not speaking or laughing or smiling.

I'm alone now, sitting in the driver's seat gripping the wheel. Tears stream down my face. Lurch is back in the garage and I'm 3, sitting in the backseat. I look around and outside the car are stacks of files and our old minivan. I just want to grow up. It's raining outside so I walk away and lay down. The rain falls on my body. I am 22. I'm alone.

Week 2 Introspection II: Roots

I remember feeling a lot less self conscious as a child. Like, I didn't care what people thought about what I was doing or why. Now, I just feel kinda stupid. I mean, I understand it, the appeal for a child, but it's still slightly awkward. I think I was more proud of myself as a child, more proud of the way my mind worked. I'd think of these awesome scenarios for my kooshlings and be all " I bet no one else has these kind of adventures." but now It's like... ooookaaaayyy... I think that stems from innocence. As children we're encouraged to be creative without restraint but as we get older society starts trying to make us conform and we lose that innocence and that freedom. We know we're going to be judged and we expect it. As kids we expect praise and encouragement. As adults we expect criticism and critique.

This week's Best of Me:

The Torrid Affairs I Have in My Head. I am going to write a book with this title. I mean come on... it's relevant. I was thinking about the idea of fantasy/makebelieve/roleplay and how the concept and definition changes from our youth into adulthood and that phrase just popped into my head. I mean, think about it. As children fantasy is innocent. Roleplay is playing house with your best friends and putting your pretend children in timeout for eating a mudpie before their dinner. As we get older fantasy becomes a genre and a type of game that nerds play and as we get older still the word takes on a sexual nature. We make believe all the time, imagining where our lives could and should go and I dunno, I just thought it'd be interesting to write down all of the fantasies and make believes I had in my head from a child through today. it's just something that intrigues me I guess.

Week 2 Introspection II: Orange

Honestly, I hadn't eaten lunch so when I found out I was gonna get to eat an orange I was quite pleased. I thought the exercise as a whole was interesting and I was particularly amused by the amount of time that had passed without my realizing it. I let my mind wander a lot so I didn't really learn anything extra special or new. I do think the exercise is relevant to understanding the creative process though because it allows you to break down your observations piece by piece until you are focusing on one sensation at a time. You feel it. You smell it. You hear it. You taste it. I think you have to be able to focus yourself like that on a regular basis if you expect to be successful as a creator.

Ideation

This is where my personal stuff ends and the Class Required Stuff begins. I don't care if you look at the other stuff, I'm just clarifying and separating.